Day 24: When the s*** hits the fan, and other euphamisms.

Anyone who has ever seen the movie "Airplane" will always have a certain scene pop into their minds at the phrase "s*** hits the fan"  Why am I using ***?  Simply put, I cuss a lot.  A lot more than some people may be comfortable with.  So I try to every now and then clean it up.  Today is one of those days.  Just roll with it.

Really though, what do you do when everything falls apart? 

Many people fall apart right with it. 

As in:  It doesn't matter what time it happened or what "good" was before the collapse, the day has gone to s*** and is awful. 

Many people give up on whatever they are doing, big or small, and declare it utter failure and let the depression over not being good enough take over.

Many people start embracing the whole "well, I'm crap anyway so of course this went to crap" (Crap is not a bad word.  I will fight you on this.)

Many people label the person or thing or idea involved as difficult and awful and blame them for having ruined the day.  And in that action, they have become a victim.

And many people have no idea they are even doing this.

I want to talk about alternate ways to face those days, those moments, those feelings when it all goes to pot. (Hey look, another alternate cuss option! I'm getting good at this!)

Tools and Tips and even a few Mantras.

Tools:

use a planner- really though, this is a prevenetative measure that can change your life.  No screwing up on overbooking, messed up timing, forgotten items, etc. 

know your limits-you may be a person who can do 15 things a day, or someone who can only do 3. know your limits and how hard/long each task is for a day before engaging/planning in it!

breathe- I may even list this one twice.  Take a second to really inhale slowly, hold, and exhale slowly.  Let your brain reset before troubleshooting.  It save a lot of stress!

watch your thoughts-as if you are two people (and you are really, you are your brain and your mind/soul) witness your thoughts. Your emotions are actually caused by those thoughts and most of the time we aren't conscious of it at all. So if you start feeling the panic and negatives stop and kind of take a step back/out of your head and witness the thoughts that are triggering it.  

learn to identify your feelings-this may seem basic, but really it is a practice.  That panic may actually be fear of failure, not panic about getting it done on time.  That anger may actually be fear masquerading.  That frustration may come out of a deep desire to make something beautiful.  Learn how your body feels physically when emotions are there.  WHERE do you feel it? Stomach? Throat? Shoulders? Do you get hot? Do you need to move your body? Do you get tight legs? As you learn to identify these sensations, you can learn how to master them and reset it!

reset your thinking-here is where mantras of sorts can be super helpful.  And it goes right along with the last point!  I have several listed out below, but I can promise you that you can come up with some too!
CRACK A JOKE!-  Never underestimate the power of humor. It can alleviate the worst moments.  You can even yell gibberish while making silly faces and it will not only help you, but may make others laugh too!  And it's much better than going on an angry tirade.

 

Mantras/Resetting Thoughts:

-I am not in danger.  Nothing is going to physically harm me in this moment or anytime soon.

-I am not a failure or a screw up.  I may have made a mistake, but that is how we learn!

-I fell when I was trying to walk as a baby too.  It's all part of the process.

-Ok.  This one moment or situation sucks, but it doesn't negate ______ (fill in with good from earlier or anticipated good later in the day)

-Well, that happened!  How would I tell this in a story? 

-I am ok.  I am going to breathe and take back this day.

-I will not give this ____ the power to rule my life.  I get to choose how I react.  I get to choose how my day will go emotionally.  And I choose positivity.

-Ok, I missed this. However, today (yesterday, whatever) I accomplished _____

-Let's list three things I appreciate in this world. 

-Count backwards from 5 (or 10 in a panic attack) making each number count for something.  IE: 5 is for flowers.  4 is for my dogs.  3 is for board games.  2 is for books.  1 is for tea. (they need to be positive or neutral items or thoughts) then after you say "1 is for___" Move your body.  Toward the action you need to take or simply stretch or do a jumping jack.  It helps reset your brain entirely.

-I have accomplished/overcome so much in my life like________.

So to recap: what do you do when s*** hits the fan? 

You get out the hose, spray off the fan, spritz it with air freshener, and carry on with your day.